on growing

Making time for God regularly is a fundamental element for spiritual growth; it will be the Lord himself who gives us the taste for his mysteries, his words, his presence and action, for feeling how beautiful it is when God speaks with us; he will enable us to understand more deeply what he expects of me. Pope Benedict XVI

Making time
Our lives are constantly on the go. From one task to another. This is why we need to make time for God.

Regularly
It's not only a spur of the moment time. It's a carved out time for us to participate in His time.

Through time with God we learned a little bit more each time about Him.
His mysteries
His words
His presence
His action
It's like dating a person. We try to seek what's on the mind of God right at this moment. We try to understand why He does what He does.

But most importantly:
Understanding what He expects of myself
To know what is required for me to grow in Him
To know what habits needed to be changed
To understand the task that I have to do today so that His will may be done in our community.

O God come to my assistance

O God, come to my assistance, O Lord, make haste to help me - Psalm 70:1

We must continuously pray this verse both in adversity
that we may be delivered,
and in prosperity that we may be preserved,
and not puffed up.
St. John Cassian

taken from: wordofgodeveryday.com

Let us pray this, every single time temptation come to our lives. Why?
Because we know that He will come to our aid, when we need it the most.
Every single time blessings is here. Why?
Because we know our pride. We know that we think the blessings came from our own self, and not from Him. Praying this word, reminds us to be delivered from pride. The source of all sins.

"Set me as a seal on your heart"

From today's office of reading:

That is why he says: ‘Set me as a seal on your heart.’ As though to say: Love me, as I love you; have me in your mind, in your memory, in your desire; in your sighing, your groaning, your weeping. Remember, man, in what state I fashioned you, how far I preferred you before the rest of creatures, the dignity with which I ennobled you; how I crowned you with glory and honour, made you a little less than the angels, and subjected all things under your feet. Remember not only the great things I did for you, but what harsh indignities I bore on your behalf; and see if you are not acting wickedly against me, if you do not love me. For who loves you as I love you? Who created you, if not I? Who redeemed you, if not I?

Baldwin of Canterbury: treatise 10 

Remember me
re-member. Let us rejoined ourselves again to Him. To become, once again, a member of His body.

For who loves you as I love you? Who created you, if not I? Who redeemed you, if not I?
nobody. nobody. nobody. But you O Lord.

Here is a prayer, that ends the treatise that Baldwin of Canterbury wrote:

Lord, take away from me the heart of stone, a heart shrunken and uncircumcised — take it away and give me a new heart, a heart of flesh, a clean heart. You cleanse our heart and love the heart that is clean — possess my heart and dwell in it, both holding it and filling it. You surpass what is highest in me, and yet are within my inmost self! Pattern of beauty and seal of holiness, mould my heart in your likeness: mould my heart under your mercy, God of my heart and God my portion for ever. Amen.

Give me a new heart O Lord. A heart that loves like You do. Amen.

Providential Hands of God

Let us allow ourselves to be guided, let us allow Providence to decide what to do with us.
Pope Benedict XVI, May 18, 2008

Providence
It comes from the latin word pro + videre. Pro means forward. Videre is to see. So, literally, it means to see forward. Let the hands of God be the one who see our future. Not ourselves. Not our might. But God's hand.

We are God's temple

For God to dwell in us, we need to listen to him; we must allow his Word to challenge us every day, meditating upon it in our hearts after the example of Mary (cf. Lk 2:51). In this way we grow in friendship with him, we learn to understand what he expects from us and we are encouraged to make him known to others.
Pope Benedict XVI, March 25, 2012

God dwell in us
St Paul once said, "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?"
We are not our own. We moved because God moved us first. We loved because God loved us first.

Allowing Him to challenge us
Let us meditate on verses that we encounter today. Mine would be, "There is joy before the angels of God over one sinner who repents."

In this verse I see the God who wants me to be the repentant sinner. I know that I am not perfect. I need to seek His will through out my day to day mundanity. That is the way we grow in friendship with Christ. We learn to understand God's quirk. We know what his likes (virtues) and dislikes (sins). And knowing means loving. If we have the best person in the world to be in our hearts, why wouldn't we want to share it with others?

Transfiguration

To look upon the face of Christ, to recognize its mystery
amid the daily events and the sufferings of his human life,
and then to grasp the divine splendor revealed in the Risen Lord,
seated in glory at the right hand of the Father;
this is the task of every follower of Christ.
St. Alphonsus Liguori

Humanity and divinity
"To err is human. To forgive, divine," says Alexander Pope. To celebrate our imperfections and to look forward to our perfections. That's why we are here on earth. Here is our task today. To know God and to know ourselves.

If my tongue cannot say that I love You

I love You, O my God,
and my only desire is to love You
until the last breath of my life.
I love You, O my infinitely lovable God,
and I would rather die loving You,
than live without loving You.
I love You, Lord
and the only grace I ask is to love You eternally…
My God, if my tongue cannot say in every moment that I love You,
I want my heart to repeat it to You as often as I draw breath.
Prayer of St. John Vianney

I want my heart to repeat it to You as often as I draw breath.
breathing in. breathing out. I love You Lord. Let it be reflected on our actions through out today.

Your grace is sufficient

Therefore, that I might not become too elated, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, an angel of Satan, to beat me, to keep me from being too elated. Three times I begged the Lord about this, that it might leave me, but he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. Therefore, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints, for the sake of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Cor 12:7-10

That I might not be too elated
During those moments of glory, how many times do we have our pride? It is so easy. We can say: that's all me. I did all the hard work. I deserved the honor. Yet, we not that's not true. We didn't built the crown ourselves. It's all team work.

His grace is enough
He gives. He takes away. It is all grace. Is that sufficient? It is more than what we can wish for.

Boast of my weakness
Imperfections is the mark of a fallen humanity. Yet, God has redeemed the world. Only through our acknowledgement. That I am weak. I am poor. I am desolate. There. We will find God in the midst of our life. When we know that all good things come from the above.

A clay in the hand of a potter

This word came to Jeremiah from the LORD:
Rise up, be off to the potter's house;
there I will give you my message.
I went down to the potter's house and there he was,
working at the wheel.
Whenever the object of clay which he was making
turned out badly in his hand,
he tried again,
making of the clay another object of whatever sort he pleased.
Then the word of the LORD came to me:
Can I not do to you, house of Israel,
as this potter has done' says the LORD.
Indeed, like clay in the hand of the potter,
so are you in my hand, house of Israel.

he tried again
Whenever we failed, God did not stop. He keeps on trying. He still knocks at the door of our heart. He wants us to grow. To become "another object of whatever sort he pleased."

Whatever sort he pleased
Who am I? I am His. What is pleasing to God, may not be pleasing to me yet. But it will be. For who am I to question His judgment? Who am I to complain of all the sufferings and trials that I have to endure? Who am I to curse the darkness? Should I light one candle instead?

Prayer

Prayer as a way of “accustoming” oneself to being with God brings into being men and women who are not motivated by selfishness, by the desire to possess or by the thirst for power, but by gratuitousness, by the desire to love, by the thirst to serve, in other words who are motivated by God; and only in this way is it possible to bring light to the darkness of the world.
Benedict XVI, June 20, 2012

Culture shock
When we pray, we feel this 4 stages of culture shock: Honeymoon, Negotiation, Adjustment, Mastery and the interdependence. We try to adjust our worldly cultural value, with the heavenly one. At first, we feel great. We love the peace and joy that it brings. After some time, we realize that the worldly culture differ with the heavenly one. We feel anxious, will this new culture bring us true and lasting peace? After a while we adjust. We know that our goal is to be in heaven. We want to leave behind our worldly desire and embrace God's way of living. Afterwards, we would master the host culture. I believe this occur only after we spend years and years of prayer and discipline. It doesn't come easily. But when it comes, we know that it's due to the grace of God.

Here is prayer. We learn to pray in order to communicate with God. We would like to give thanks. We would want to love. We want to serve the Lord who created us in the first place. Truly, through these 4 steps will we bring light into the darkness of the world. Let us pray that He will guide us each step of the way.

To be one

With all of humanity
we are called to be one with the rest of creation:
and with it, we are invited to move together
into a deeper relationship with the loving Creator.
St. Ignatius of Loyola, 16th century

Called to be one
E Pluribus unum. Out of many, one. Divided by our own diversity, we are called to be one. To serve one purpose: to glorify God.

Relationship
With unity of mind, we are called to a deeper relationship. Are we ready?

Trusting difficulties

All the difficulties we meet in following Christ and bearing witness to His Gospel can be overcome by opening ourselves trustingly to the action of the Lord.
Pope Benedict XVI, 13 June 2012

difficulties
Jesus said, “If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." A cross is not a piece of jewelry that we hang around our neck. A cross is a cruel tool for executing vigilante at Jesus' time. To deny ourselves and to take our cross is not an easy thing to do. No wonder we find difficulties in following Him!

trust
But Jesus also said,  “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your selves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.” His yoke is easy and His burden light. I'd say that Jesus is talking in relative terms here. The cross that we bear is difficult and tough. But the alternatives are worse. The alternative is to live "easy and flabby", to satisfy all the desires that we have, etc. But we will be worse off later on. We shall see that in the end, that His way is a better way. His way brings eternal peace. His way is the real highway.

To be holy

Looking at Mary, we recognize the loftiness and beauty of God's plan for everyone: to become holy and immaculate in love (cf. Eph 1: 4), in the image of our Creator."
Pope Benedict XVI, December 8, 2007, angelus address on the solemnity of the immaculate conception

Saturday is traditionally a time to commemorate the blessed virgin Mary. It is on that first Saturday in between good Friday and easter Sunday that she chose to hope rather than to despair. She might not know the full details on what would happen the following day, but she trusted. She trusted that God would have the last say on the awful reality of her own son's death on the cross the previous day.

So, like Mary, let us be mindful of our own limitation. We are incapable of understanding the fullness of God's divine providence in our lives. What happened yesterday and what will happen tomorrow might seem to be beyond our grasp. Yet, we recognize one thing: that God's plan is lofty and pretty. That 'His plan is so that we all become holy and immaculate in love in the image of our Creator'. In other words: to bring joy (eventually) to our lives, to teach us to become the best version of ourselves. And for that we can only do one thing: to trust.

Sorrow's touch

God is touched by our sorrows
and does not allow them to last forever.
St. Claude de la Colombiere

Sorrow
Here we are Lord, your church militant, fighting our way into heaven. We are sorrowful because of the hardship that we have to endure. As the prophet Habakkuk says,

For though the fig tree does not blossom, and no fruit appears on the vine,
Though the yield of the olive fails
and the terraces produce no nourishment,
Though the flocks disappear from the fold
and there is no herd in the stalls,
Yet I will rejoice in the LORD and exult in my saving God.

We are hopeful people. Because we believe that the Lord is on our side. That the Lord will bring forth justice toward His sons and daughter here on earth.

Allow
This is the key word. That God allows it to happen. Whatever the circumstances. We believe that we are never tried beyond our strength. St. Paul puts it this way: "No trial has come to you but what is human. God is faithful and will not let you be tried beyond your strength; but with the trial he will also provide a way out, so that you may be able to bear it." Yet, Mother Teresa would also say, “I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much.” The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the LORD!

Listen

"Pay attention, come to me; listen, and your soul will live." Isaiah 55:3

Pay attention, come to me
“God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: It is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world” CS Lewis once said. Whichever one he choose to use, it is an invitation from him. Invitation to be a part of his family.

Listen, and your soul will live
Listen in. He is there waiting to feed our soul. Let us humble ourselves and purge the urge to whisper, speak, and shout back to Him. Let us instead listen in, so that our souls may live.

Branches of Christ

Each of us is like a branch which lives only if it grows every day through prayer and participation in the Sacraments, through charity and union with the Lord. Those who love Christ, the true vine, produce fruits of faith for an abundant spiritual harvest.
Pope Benedict XVI, May 6, 2012

Branches
Jesus said, "I am the vine, you are the branches. Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit, because without me you can do nothing."Without Christ, we can do nothing.

Growth through prayer and sacraments
Growth through our relationship with God, the source of all being. Prayer in all things. Even the simple alleluia will do. Sacraments. The need of a visible sign of an invisible reality in our lives are stronger than ever. We want something concrete to grasp the reality of faith. That is where sacraments upholds us.

Growth through charity and union with the Lord
Charity, the greatest of all virtue. To be in charity means to care with what matters to others. Union with the Lord. To say like Mary says, "let it be done to me according to Thy words." To mean what we pray in the our Father, "Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done."

Those who love Christ...produce fruits of faith for an abundant spiritual harvest.
What's the fruits of our faith? St. Paul says to the Galatians church that the fruit of the spirit is "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law." Let the fruit be abundant in our lives, so that we can share it with others who are along the way to Heaven as well. 

All things fail

"All things fail, but you, Lord of them all, never fail."
St. Teresa of Avila

All things fail.
Yesterday, the computer system in our research computing facility failed. As a result, a couple of us were not able to log into our own computer to do work. I know I fail at times too. When I choose sin over grace. When I choose self pity instead of self sacrifice. Blocking His grace to come and work on my imperfections. GK Chesterton would say, "The rare strange thing is to hit the mark; the gross, obvious thing is to miss it." How many times have I failed in believing this following verse?
But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me.

But you, Lord of them all, never fail.

The Lord never fails. He always succeeds. He is the epitome of perfection. The only logical thing for us to do is to trust. To trust in His providential plan. To believe that our hope is not a vain hope. Our hope is in a person who never fail to go beyond our own expectation. Jesus, I trust in You.

Pilgrims

"Every one of us is a pilgrim. We are all drawn forward, with purpose, along God’s path. Naturally, then, we tend to look back on life – sometimes with regrets or hurts, often with thanksgiving and appreciation – and we also look ahead – sometimes with trepidation or anxiety, but always with expectation and hope, knowing too that there are others who encourage us along the way."
Pope Benedict XVI, Regina Pacis Center, Amman, Jordan, May 8, 2009.

Here we go. I will be writing every day. A reflection. Frustration. Hope. Anything. For me to reflect. I hope that it will bring hope. 

Pilgrim. 

A term that means that we are nomadic. We don't just settle in one place or time. We move constantly. As Blessed John Henry Cardinal Newman said, "To live is to change, and to be perfect is to have changed often."

Drawn Forward.

We are drawn to move on. To look beyond the past and into the future. Which way is forward? It is God's path. We will grow in this path. 

Looking back: regrets. hurts. thanksgiving. appreciation. 

That is what past looks like. There is a lot of these 4 things. Regrets of the things that had been done or had not been done. Hurts from what others did to us. Thanksgiving for the love that has been given to us. Thanksgiving for God's hand in all things. As the psalmist said, "Unless the LORD build the house,

they labor in vain who build. Unless the LORD guard the city, in vain does the guard keep watch. It is vain for you to rise early and put off your rest at night, To eat bread earned by hard toil—all this God gives to his beloved in sleep." Appreciation. Appreciation that in the end: all that happen in the past is part of His loving providence. 

Looking ahead: trepidation. anxiety. expectation. hope. 

Trepidation for uncertainty. Trepidation that some how in some perverse way, everything that we have built would collapse and tumble. Anxiety for the future. Will the things that we want will come to fruition? Will my will be done? Expectation. I expect that Christ will be in control. Which means that I have to lose control. Hope. Hope that there will be rainbow after the strong thunderstorm. Hope that there will be hope after despair. Hope that when things don't make sense, that can only mean one thing. He is God. I am not. Thank God for that.